I didn’t write a post last week, so I’m now reflecting on the last 14 days. Both weeks, I worked out 3 times, leaning completely on my personal training sessions and Wednesday running/walking group. These accountability structures proved to be a gift, especially because I have been struggling to complete an essay. What a joy to have submitted that essay and also be able to say that I kept exercising!

These past 2 weeks, I’ve been struck by how ruthlessly time flies. Whether you are having a good time or not, doing what you value or not, acheiving what you want or not, time will keep on marching. So, you can easily look up and not have done what you intended. This is why it is so important to put structures in place that increase your likelihood of doing that which aligns with your values and long-term goals, not just what feels urgent from day to day.

Like everyone, I am juggling many responsibilities that have little to do with what is most important to me. So, if I am going to continue prioritizing my health, nurturing my relationships, and writing, I MUST put these things on my schedule before each week begins. There’s nothing new about that idea, and I’ve certainly benefited from having this truth reiterated by Kerry Ann Rockquemore, who runs Faculty Success boot camps and writes a weekly column for Inside Higher Education. But whether you consult materials like that or not, it’s crucial that you make a habit of putting yourself in your calendar and honor those appointments as if you were meeting your boss. After all, you’re meeting someone much more important!

spinach, jasmine rice, steamed carrots, asparagus, black quinoa, roasted kale

Besides relying on scheduled training sessions and group runs, I have also been prioritizing cooking for the week on Sundays so that there’s always something healthy ready. Besides saving money and knowing exactly how my food is prepared, I also feel like I save time while prioritizing my health in ways that no one else can do for me.

Let’s commit to putting what we value most in our schedules before the week and all its demands have a chance to influence what we end up doing.

This was my first week fully adjusting to my running restriction. I worked out 4 times. Monday, I had a personal training session focused on resistance, followed by 20 minutes on the elliptical machine. The elliptical has never been a favorite. However, it’s an approved alternative, so I am going to maximize it. On Wednesday, I walked 3 miles while other group members ran. What a treat to have my BGR! sister Carie stay with me the entire time! (No pressure, though, I promise!) I had another PT session on Friday. Then, this morning, I did a spinning class for the first time in a long time. Good stuff!

What became clear to me this week was the need to focus on all the good things about this journey. I already knew that I wanted to guard against becoming preoccupied with comparing my present capacities to what I could do 12 to 18 months ago, but the dangers of comparison felt more intense when I was told not to run. As Carie shared in a comment last week, it is really easy to focus on what you can’t do and thereby lose motivation. I am not immune to that struggle.

And when that struggle emerges, it’s important to remember that some things are not negative unless we insist upon a negative spin. For example, my running restriction does not have to be seen as a lack. However, it will most certainly create negative energy if I view it that way. The energy we create with our approach to various situations is powerful. Indeed, I’m noticing that when I focus on gratitude for what I already have and what I can already do, I create better energy around not only my physical activities but also around my writing.

Like anything worth doing consistently, this is sometimes easier said than done. But we have the power to make our words into actions. Let’s keep doing this!

I am happy to say that I maintained my commitment to judge less and do more this week. I exercised four times, giving myself credit for simply moving and taking small steps in the right direction. Confident that I wouldn’t sabotage myself if I took Monday off, I did so. I focused more on reading and writing that day. I’m aiming to get back to incorporating reading, writing, and exercising into every day, but I’m not there yet.

My workout sessions picked up on Wednesday with my weekly BGR! meet-up. On Friday, I ran with a friend. We covered 5 miles, walking half of it. (She was letting me set the pace. She could’ve run the entire distance a lot faster than I was allowing us to go.) On Saturday, I started the day writing, so I didn’t meet friends for an early morning run. Still, I was determined to do something, so I walked and jogged (mostly walked) for 30 minutes on the home treadmill. This morning, I decided to push myself more than I had the last two workouts. I ended up running 4 miles non-stop. It was the first time I’ve done that since November.

What I like most about these past few weeks is that I have focused more on consistency than on hitting certain targets for each workout. That is, moving three times per week is my goal. I don’t need each of those three sessions to look a certain way. This is important because I don’t want to fall into the trap of beating myself up because I’m not doing now what I could easily do 12 to 18 months ago. I believe in competing with myself, but not if that simply becomes an opportunity to criticize myself. Besides, I didn’t get into my current shape overnight, so why should I expect to change it instantly?

Wherever you are on this journey, please know that, despite what our culture wants us to believe, every step in the right direction is worth celebrating! Not every step needs to be a giant leap to yield serious benefits. The world is full of people who are happy to refuse to give you credit for what you do—big or small. In fact, some people think that’s their job. Well, let them have at it, but don’t help them do it.

Last week, I wasn’t happy about having worked out only once, so I re-committed to myself and vowed to tap into positive energy more often. This week, I achieved and exceeded my goal of three exercise sessions. I was determined to start the week better, so I didn’t let Monday pass without a 40-minute walk/run. Then, I got a little help from Mother Nature. Unlike last week, the temperature on Wednesday was above zero, so I could launch Wednesday Winners, the new weekly run/walk I’m leading for Black Girls RUN! Columbus. Already, I am loving the accountability of that weekly meet-up.

On Friday, only once I began exercising did I realize that my energy level was very low. I lasted for 30 minutes, and I didn’t judge it. I listened to my body and focused on the fact that I had moved. By Saturday, I was ready to enjoy some company for my workout and got up in time to meet friends. Sunday, I used my new WaterRower machine for 15 minutes. I am still learning proper form, so again, I gave myself credit for moving.

I am making a habit of acknowledging every good decision and every small step in the right direction rather than focusing on what I didn’t do or what I don’t like. That’s certainly a new way of operating for me, so it will continue to take practice.

While it is not yet my tendency, I already feel confident that it will yield serious benefits. After all, what running has taught me is that the habits it most encourages will give me great results if I apply them in other areas of my life, especially writing. Yes, I can see how this practice of kindness will reap benefits! And as I return to what I know above all else, that Audre Lorde was right about self-care being a form of political warfare, then taking kindness toward myself seriously might be the most important habit I can develop.

How about you? Are you starting to see that being mean to ourselves is NOT the solution? The diet industry and all of U.S. culture tells us that we should feel unworthy unless we look a certain way and are willing to sacrifice certain things. We are all encouraged to accept shame as a constant companion. We have the right to live free of guilt and shame, but American culture shows no signs of changing soon, so we have to be deliberate about claiming that right.